Non-furry people, herein are my feline cat rules and regulations
This list is not comprehensive, and will be updated and modified based on MY mood at any moment in time.
I am the most furry CEO in the world!
I will be referred to as CEO Shop Cat
I will have made available to me for any and all services rendered:
fancy water in bottles (not from the US) German streams only.
canned food only ~ and not Friskies (sorry Friskie makers but your stuff sucks)
Kibble of only the elite brands (NOT Purina) sorry Purina, you never sent me samples
Oh and no weird triangle brown and orange shapes allowed.
NO go pro or other devices will be mounted to my furry body.
I will NOT wear clothing or items that make me look furry fat
Photos: will be taken as to always show my best angle, no shots that show me
looking excessively furry or fat will be allowed
I will retain all rights to the photos and videos and will consider selling them
for whatever price I feel like.
I require a groomer/handler on call 24/7 to pay special attention to my
fur shedding issues.
I will require that my Dietz Wood Design Company team, Rick, Colby and Tanner, whom I consider my adoptive owners receive significant orders, since I get a cut of these orders as a bonus. and contributes to my Golden Parachute with the company.
There will be no fur/hair color changes, I am what I am, and that's gorgeous!
NO baths, I take my own in private.
I am not available during my scheduled catnaps, i.e. 8:30 till 5pm Eastern Standard Tennessee time and from 6pm till 8 am. Eastern Standard Tennessee time (when I do my mousing) Yes that's a short window of opportunity so peeps be ready!
I require soothing music during my catnap times, NO rap and such or anything
that makes my fur ruffle. Sorry rappers, it's not my thing.
Dogs and alien cats attending any shots must be approved by me and vetted by my handlers. Specifically Doris' s Miley Dog who is trying to get a job as Shop Dog. Not on my watch!
Touching of my cute furry body will be by MY invite only.
Oh, forgot to mention, transport is via only vehicles better than Colby and Tanner's
stupid Honda thing. It needs to run right and have AC and heat for my sensitive cat nature.
A significant donation matching my earnings is required to the animal rescue group
of my choice.
Got questions? call Jen my official feline attorney at law & owner of my dog friend Olive. Oh yeah, she's a real attorney, and loves to argue! Don't go there with her!
Oh, forgot to say she will also need a 10K retainer to participate in any social media
Meow, and it's time for a catnap. Have your people call my people at